Fraü Gretchen von Ribbentrop

Date and Place of Birth: 23 May 1945, Hamburg, Germany.

Current Positions: Head of Administration, Legal Affairs, Catering, Car Park Manager, Public Works at the HHDRS

Prior Occupations: Executive Assistant to Friedrich Hayek, Mont Pelerin Society, Principal Legal Advisor Alternative für Deutschland, Class Actions and Consumer Complaints BMW (Australia)

Qualifications: Dipl.-Jur (Berlin); LLM (Galtieri University Buenos Aires); Cert IV, Sandwiches and Sponges, CWA Institute. 

Dress size: 10.

Pet’s Name: Hermann (Alsatain) 

Favourite Documentary: Olympia: The 1936 Olympic Games by Leni Riefenstahl

Favourite Book: My Stoat and Me by Carl Schmitt

Favourite band: Bix Schicklgruber Jazz Band

Pet hates: Disorder 

Phobias: Paperclips

Favourite Food: Schnitzel

Childhood Hero: Richard Wagner

Western Zodiac: Gemini

Chinese Zodiac: Year of the Banded Hedgehog

Babylonian Zodiac: House of the Distended Uvula

Famous Quote: “You can’t there dumkopf!”

Born in Hamburg Germany in 1945, Fraü Gretchen von Ribbentrop joined the HHDRS as head of legal affairs and catering in 1999.  In recent years she has added the roles of car park manager, head of public works and  human resources to her portfolio.

Fraü Ribbentrop has revealed little about her past, although it is rumoured she was poached by the HHDRS from BMW (Australia) in 1998 after a salesman let slip to one of Dr Truthwright’s personal assistants that the company’s legal affairs and government relations division had recently engaged a person fluent in the works of Carl Schmitt who had just arrived in Australia via Paraguay and Argentina. 

In her role as head of legal affairs Fraü Gretchen is responsible for overseeing the HHDRS’s growing number of partnership agreements with likeminded historical reenactment societies overseas, such as The Abraham Lincoln Ford’s Theatre Players in the US, The Vienna-based Archduke Franz Ferdinand Assassination Mime Troupe, South Korea’s Park Chung-hee  Go Karting Federation, the King Faisal I Water Park in Riyadh, and the Muamar Gaddafi Shooting and Archery Club in Tripoli.  She is currently heading the HHDRS negotiating team working towards establishing future partnership agreements with the Yitzak Shamir Paragliding and Cheese Making Kibutz and Egypt’s Anwar Sadat Baton Twirling and Choral Society.

An accomplished cook (after her curried egg sandwiches swept the Best Use of Poultry Awards at the 2002 Royal Adelaide Show she was offered a position on the board of the Country Women’s Association), Fraü Ribbentrop has also served as a personal assistant to former Masterchef judge George Calombaris and as a contributing editor to The Encyclopedia of Tattooed and Pierced Monarchs published by Alternative für Deutschland Verlag, one of Germany’s leading libertarian publishing houses.

 A noted disciplinarian, Fraü Gretchen’s best-selling “How to Manage  a Moron” (Wie man einen Idioten führt) remained on the Herald Sun best seller list for 49 weeks and has been used extensively by One Nation leader Pauline Hanson.   Fraü Gretchen has been especially influential in the One Nation’s leader’s cultivation of an acute sense of danger.  For example, both women share a concern of the risk posed by natural fibres and cruciferous vegetables, both of which they view as integral to hostile forces being able to read their thoughts.